ALL FOOLS’ DAY: Ivy League announces plans for expansion in basketball

In a shocking move, the Ivy League has announced it is considering expansion in basketball only.

“It’s time for the league to broaden our horizons,” Ivy League executive director Robin Harris said. “We want to make #2bidivy happen, and this is how we do it.”

Harris said the Princeton women’s team getting a No. 8 seed and Yale getting snubbed from the NIT altogether was a wakeup call for the league.

“We didn’t realize we were so invisible in the eyes of the NCAA before,” Harris said. “We also didn’t realize our football teams don’t participate in the postseason, so we’ll be doing something to rectify that in a few years too.”

The Ivy League is looking to add Army, Navy, Northwestern, Colgate, William & Mary and Lafayette. Harris said while these schools have been granted acceptance by the league, they will not be considered academic members of the league, nor members in any other sports besides basketball.

Harris added that a conference tournament would be instituted for basketball when the six new schools begin league competition in 2018.

The announcement was applauded by President Barack Obama, who watched his niece, Leslie Robinson, a member of the Princeton women’s team, play in the NCAA tournament in College Park, Md. last month.

“Princeton should have been higher-seeded in that tournament, and if expansion will help eliminate Ivy seeding errors in the future, then so be it,” Obama said. “Of course, I must admit that the seeding for Princeton this year was engineered solely so I wouldn’t have to travel to watch Princeton, but … hey, who wants to talk about Isis?”

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